Christiana Miller


1) Being a mom defines my life. It’s my favorite thing to be. I’m also an author and screenwriter, and a first generation Greek-American.

2) I grew up in a small, blue-collar town near Chicago, that made national headlines for its murders, corruption and other bizarro happenings.

3) My DNA was shot into space and is currently cohabiting on a drawer in the Space Station, next to Stephen Colbert and Stephen Hawking.

4) At one time, I spoke five languages and played six instruments. Now, I’m lucky I remember two languages and can vaguely play three instruments.

5) Best job ever -- getting paid to play pinball! It was AWESOME! I was the writer and videographer for the pinball promo videos “Indiana Jones and the Pinball Adventure” and “Star Trek: The Next Generation Pinball Odyssey.” If you want to see them, you can find them on YouTube.

6) I’m still trying (and mostly failing) to lose my pregnancy weight. I have until the baby turns 18, right?

7) I can speed-read if I have to, but I hate it. I started reading when I was 2, and I’ve had a life-long love affair with books ever since.

8) When I was 4, I was on a jet that started falling apart over Canada and had to make a crash landing. To help me get over my fear of flying, when I was an adult, I piloted a 4-seat Cessna.

9) My weirdest job was filling in for Death. I had to ride a pale horse in front of the hearse, to the grave site. The cemetery also had a llama, a peacock and a deer.

10) When I was 8, my mom and godmother taught me how to read coffee grounds, so I could tell them their future.

11) I hate living in a messy house, but I also hate cleaning the house. Unless I’m procrastinating over a deadline. It’s a conundrum. Thank goodness for deadlines.

12) I’m the voices of all the female warriors on Mortal Kombat II and III.

13) I’m a TV addict, but I never get enough time to watch it. Most of the time, the minute I sit down to watch TV, I fall asleep.

14) I got so used to writing with kid’s cartoons on, I had to turn them on even when no one was home, just to be able to write. I’ve finally weaned myself off of them, by writing in an office that has no TV and no internet.

15) My third wackiest job paid me to be an audience member for talk shows and get the audience talking.

16) No, I’m not going to tell you what my second wackiest job was. But it involved a flower shop and a bad-tempered boss who threw knives at his employees.

17) My second “most fun” job was in promotional merchandise. I had a co-worker who protested the lack of air conditioning by stripping down to her undies. Most fun co-worker ever. The UPS guy loved dropping in, because he never knew what he was going to see.

18) My fourth most unusual job was reading tarot cards, coffee grounds and (fake) entrails for charity events.

19) I started working when I was 14, waitressing and selling horses and tack. I bought my first horse when I was 15.

20) I am an eclectic collector. Especially now that my child is assisting in decorating the house. Dragons, fairies, Kokopellis and kachinas, surrounded by marine and land animals. Not to mention thousands of books. My house would give an interior designer a migraine.

21) My favorite dogs are Dobermans. My favorite cats are Egyptian Maus. My first Doberman looked like he stepped out of a vampire movie. People would stop their cars and ask about him.

22) I’ve ridden two elephants in my life -- one had a wicked sense of humor and the other one fell in love with me. Her trainer wasn’t too happy though, when he looked up to find his elephant had walked off with me, with her trunk around my shoulders and riders still on her back.

23) My fashion sense is all about comfort. My daughter, on the other hand, is all about fashion. She’s been choosing her own clothes since she was two and she has a formidable shoe collection.

24) I’ve been coated in Gene Simmons’s sweat (yuck) -- and it’s not how you may think -- I crashed a private rock-and-roll after party where I met Rob Zombie, and I drove a costumed Ace Frehley tribute rocker home and watched him scale a building (For more info, check out my blog entry on KISS).

25) An accomplishment I’m proud of: Co-founding The Chicago Screenwriters Network with Ed Bernero, who went on to create Criminal Minds. And the CSN named an honorary screenwriting award after us -- the Bernero/Miller award -- and presented the first one to Harold Ramis. (At least, that’s what I was told!). But how cool is that?

26) I have many varied and unusual friends. Among my friends are a professional ghostbuster, an Eastern Orthodox monk and a couple of Klingons.

27) A funny anecdote about my Klingon friends. When I moved out here, I threw a huge party. J.G. Hertzler showed up with Ron Canada (both Klingons from DS:9) after they were thrown out of a bar for being rowdy. As they stood on my pool deck, singing the Klingon National Anthem, a Rolling Stone reporter who was at the party tripped and was falling face-first into the pool. Without missing a note, the Klingons grabbed her in mid-air, swung her over the pool and back onto the deck. All while continuing to sing the Klingon National Anthem.

28) My favorite gym class was bowling. Followed by golf. My worst gym class was track. If I want to run that fast, I’ll ride a horse. I’m all about leisure sports. If I want to exercise, I’ll pull out the Wii. Did I mention I haven’t lost my pregnancy weight yet?

29) One January, my mom called me up and told me I was going to get married within the next few months. I laughed at her, because I wasn’t dating anyone. A week later, a guy I had met online sent me his photo. I took one look at this funny, jokey picture he had taken with a friend and I started hyperventilating, because I knew this was the man I was going to marry. And within four months, we were. And we’re still together.

30) While I was working on Star Trek: Voyager, I was invited (and went!) to Ron Moore’s castle in the hills for the annual Christmas party. It was pretty awesome. Ron Moore would later go on to re-create BATTLESTAR GALACTICA.

31) I once walked through the actual Starship Enterprise (although it was Voyager by then). The set is really extensive. At one point on the set, you can’t even tell you’re on a set anymore. All you see, in every direction, is the ship’s interior.

32) I used to work as an actress. One of my favorite gigs was acting in murder mystery parties. That was a lot of fun. We’d get the clues in advance, but other than that, we’d improvise the whole show. My favorite location was performing on boats, sailing across Lake Michigan.

33) I was once paid to be a flapper at a 1920’s party. My mom still has a photo of me with “Al Capone.”

34) I wrote for General Hospital during the Caesar Faison kidnapping of Felicia and, years later, I wrote for General Hospital: Night Shift. My episode dealt with the big Scorpio family reunion and Robert Scorpio’s colon cancer.

35) I knew the minute I got pregnant with my daughter and I told the disbelieving doctor exactly when she was going to be born. And sure enough, the baby came along right on schedule and proved me right.

36) The busier I am, the more I can get done. When I’m not doing much of anything, it’s like I have no time to get anything done. There’s gotta be a law of physics to cover that weird time compression thing.

37) If I wasn’t a writer, I’d be... a teacher. Or an actor. Or a videographer. Or a librarian. Or a ghostbuster. Or maybe just a full-time mom, step-mom and the youngest step-grandma on the planet.


Name: Christiana Miller

Birthday: September 7th


A tidy person who doesn’t procrastinate so much.


"What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality."

                            -- Plutarch

“…a hint was to Esk what a mosquito bite was to the average rhino because she was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite them so that they don’t apply to you.”

                   -- Terry Pratchett,                                                               

                       Equal Rites

"In my dream, the angel shrugged and said, if we fail this time, it will be a failure of imagination. and then she placed the world gently in the palm of my hand."

                     -- Brian Andreas

"Power is determined by how quickly one can move from one failure to the next without losing hope or enthusiasm."

                -- Winston Churchill

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."

                        -- Oscar Wilde



Fun Facts About Me